Football Chapter 14 part 2
Katherine and Gabriel talk.
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Jomo17

Jeff Watkins
Thank you for your review. The story depends upon projection to develop the character. For example, the star fish is not capable of wanting to be free. It is the girl who wants to be free. The chocolate lab's need for approval is also the girl's need for approval. Etc.

I psychoanalyze my characters, and to understand them, the reader must psychoanalyze them, also. Again, thank you for the encouraging review.
04-Aug-2020
For the review on
Gift by Jeff Watkins

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a beautiful piece of flash fiction. You set the scene with effective details so that the reader can imagine the setting vividly. I love that each word matters as it has to with this type of writing. I was able to imagine the child feeling enboldened because she feels safe with her aunt there. She strokes the starfish and sets it free indicating her kind heart. You elicited excellent imagary. I was able to picture the girl, her aunt, the man, and his dog. Good luck in the contest! This is a strong entry and I enjoyed reading it.


sandramitchell
Goodness me, Jomo, my head is really swelling! Thank you so very much for your gracious review of this one, and the lovely six stars! I'm delighted you enjoyed it, and really appreciate your most encouraging review. Thank you, my friend! :)) Sandra xx
27-Jul-2020
For the review on
AmaZing Animals - R by sandramitchell

Chapter 18 of the book AmaZing Animals

Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Once again, you knocked it out of the park. The poem is fun, informative, and easy to read. The meter is perfect which makes the poem smooth. The facts are interesting and would appeal to your target audience. I like the use of subtitles and yours are catchy. The illustrations complement the writing perfectly. I am so impressed.


royowen
Thanks so much Jono, for these lovely comments and a great review, blessings Roy
24-Jul-2020
For the review on
Rebecca's birthday. by royowen

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is such a beautuful tribute to your daughter. It has a nice rhythm and reads smoothly. You capture the essence of your daughter's kind nature which was demontrated in Kindergarten when she showed compassion for others. She has accomplished so much-2 degrees and a wonderful family. Happy birthday to your daughter!


Melodie Michelle
;-)
24-Jul-2020
For the review on
Rachel's Gift by Jomo17

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

EXCELLENT story!
I adore the storyline and the characters interact well together;-)

Thank you for sharing;-) Many blessings to you and your family;-)


Melodie Michelle
Thank you for your kind and encouraging words as well as for the EXCELLENT review and my five stars;-)

May God bless you and your family;-)
24-Jul-2020
For the review on
memories fall down my cheeks ... by Melodie Michelle

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This poem brought me to tears. You did such a great job expressing how your memories of your son as a baby are so vivid. Then you bring the reader through the progression of your life which was fraught with so much adversity. Your guilt is palpable and I found myself wishing I could reassure you. Addiction is a disease and does not diminish your worth as a person. Your son sounds like an amazing person. I wish you and him the best.


roof35
Thank you for your comments and five stars. Much appreciated.
24-Jul-2020
For the review on
Anna, The Dog, and I by roof35

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very cute story about a child not sugar coating the truth. Great details and descriptions. I could picture the adorable dog taking off so he could see his little friend. The ending made me chuckle. Good luck in the contest!


humpwhistle
Thank you, Jomo. I'm glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
24-Jul-2020
For the review on
Superpower Denied by humpwhistle

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I really enjoyed this flash fiction piece. You got my attention right away. The first sentence is so important with flash fiction and your sentence drew me in immediately. I like how you wrote that Rachel thought of lip reading as her superpower but you didn't reveal what the superpower was until later on. I can relate to her secret as my hearing has deteriotated in the past few years. Good luck in the contest!


royowen
Thanks so much, for these lovely comments and a great review, blessings Roy
23-Jul-2020
For the review on
May your house... by royowen

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a beautifully written poem. It has a nice flow and the meter is spot on. I like the use of repetition (May). It really works to set the tone of wishing the reader well. This is a lovely religious poem and expresses faith without being overbearing or judgemental. I enjoyed reading it. I am happy to read uplifting poems in this troubling time.


thaities, Rebecca V.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this story. I'm grateful you enjoyed it!
23-Jul-2020
For the review on
The Operation by thaities, Rebecca V.

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent story! I was pulled in right away. I was actually scared that you were going to have to go through the operation without anesthesia. I don't blame you for fighting them off. When I was ten I had my gums cut at the dentist witout the novacaine kicking in. Nobody believed me and I was so docile I just let them do it. I felt everything! I love your descriptions and felt relief that you and your sister were ok. Two for the price of one. Wow, unreal how things used to go down. I love the ending. Your poor mom. The details you used were very effective, such as the blood in the floorboards. Good luck in the contest. This is a very strong entry.


Jeff Watkins
You are welcome. I have a 100 word story in my portfolio that I think you will like. It's title is Gift. I have another story, but it is for strong stomachs.
23-Jul-2020
For the review on
Rachel's Gift by Jomo17

Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a marvelous full of suspense and moral lessons. We need lots of those moral lessons for sure. The narrative seems simple, yet the story is deceptively complex. The sophisticates will think it is for children only, but they will be wrong. Jeff Watkins



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