Self Improvement Poetry posted October 22, 2020

This work has reached the exceptional level
My emotions have crashed

Mountain Top

by David Sumich

Clumped together in a small huddled mass
My emotions shiver recounting their past
Swirling about them is a cold wintry blast
Cutting to their core and depleting them fast.

Fading and fawning, tears brim in their eyes
There's no eluding the pain they despise
Their mere existence, a ghastly disguise
A front for this man, his game and his lies.

So now they face their own discontent
Embracing their death, their will is not bent!
As they fade to black, just one sound is sent
An echo that asks where their innocence went.

Rhyming Poem contest entry

The imagery here is a personification of my collective emotions. At times I feel detached from them and can observe them outside of myself. In this case, I imagined them as a group of individuals tragically trapped on a high mountain top, where they meet their end in a sad but stoic fashion.

As with all my poems, I try to say as much as I can in a tight constraint of 3 stanzas, each with 4 lines, and I ask that you consider that when reading. Was I effective in creating imagery and conveying a clear story or feeling in that small space? That is what I always strive to do in a unique and personal way. Thanks for reading!

Original artwork by the author also.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

Save to Bookcase Promote This Share or Bookmark
Print It View Reviews

You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.

© Copyright 2021. David Sumich All rights reserved.
David Sumich has granted, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.