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Category: | General Fiction |
Posted: | November 30, 2020 Views: 8 |
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Warning: The author has noted that this contains the highest level of sexual content.
Elves Union Sends letter to Employer
"Santa Claus 2020"
by zeezeewriter
Dear Mr. Claus.
As president of the Union of Santa's Little Helpers, (S.L.H. Inc.) I'm giving you fair warning of an impending lawsuit.
As of last week, the number of Covid 19 infections in your toy factory is at an all-time high of 372. Working conditions are deplorable. Elves are forced to work long hours in cramped conditions without masks.
Your suggestion of strapping a teddy bear to their nose is not only unsatisfactory but could spread the virus to children in receipt of said Teddy Bears.
Also, it has come to our attention that Mrs. Claus (the current Mrs. Audrey Claus, not to be confused with the older Mrs. Beatrice Claus now living in Fort Myers under an assumed name) has been trading sex for cookies.
The elves are agreeable to providing sexual intercourse to your new wife, but her cookies are tasteless and often result in dysentery.
A factory full of elves suffering diarrhea and coughing due to the flu has made for unsanitary conditions. Slip and fall injuries have quadrupled.
The following is a list of demands by your employees.
1. New masks available for every shift.
2. Hand sanitizer at every work station.
3. A footstool in your wife's bedroom.
Yours Truly,
Devon Staudemeyer, CEO of S.L.H Inc.
Author Notes
Dull morning. Just a little funny.
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Pays
one point
and 2 member cents.
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© Copyright 2016.
zeezeewriter
All rights reserved.
zeezeewriter
has granted FanStory.com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work. |
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