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 Category:  Humor Non-Fiction
  Posted: October 11, 2017      Views: 102
Chapters:
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 ABOUT
BARB HENSONGISPSACA 

Barb works at the local food bank volunteering her time at the country market. Barb has lived just about every profession there is to do. She has had a wild ride in her lifetime and uses poetry to tell everything. She is a cancer survivor. She hates - more...

She is an accomplished poet and is currently at the #7 spot on this years rankings.

She is also an active reviewer and is holding the #10 spot on the top ranked reviewer list.

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Chapter 16 of the book Let's Laugh 5
contest entry
"Mom's Visit" by Barb Hensongispsaca



First of all, I want to wish all my FanStory fans, friends, acquaintances, Tom, and everyone else a very Merry Christmas (I don't mean to offend anyone but this is how I grew up) and a blessed New Year. I know it is early but not according to the stores and they are the ultimate holiday experts.

Second, I want to remind every one that keeping the reason for Christmas and the holidays real and recorded for the next generation is so very important. It's not toys and candy and Santa Claus and elves. It is for a special birth of a simple man who came to show us life.

I decided it was time to visit my daughters for Christmas. Since I had moved to Canada, I made the trip every few months if I could afford it, but I shied away from holidays. My girls always needed to be another place when I visited, so I made sure they did not feel they had to break their plans just for me.

I thought it was about time for them to remember their mother's face and the reason she was in another country. Don't get me wrong, I love them dearly and I know they love me, but I am a lecturer. Oh, I try not to be, but it comes naturally from my mother's side of the family. Most of you know this is true from the soap boxes I get on sometimes and you have to survive my tangents. By the way, have I remembered to thank everyone of you for your patience?

It was one o'clock in the morning when I left for a five hour trip from Canada to Ohio. I attended a Christmas party with my husband, and before you ask, no, I did not drink. My time of dancing on the table with a lamp shade on my head is long gone.

The trip usually takes five hours when the weather is good and the wait at the border goes smoothly. 'Smoothly' is the ratio of the number of vehicles trying to cross the border multiplied by the seniority of the border guard. You can always tell the difference between a new, gung-ho, all-pressed, by-the-books, haul-them-in-for-a-strip-search, fresh-out-of-training guard and a well-seasoned, non-smiling, eye-twinkling, four-question-routine, have-a-good-day passport inspector.

A well seasoned border guard checks the passport, asks if you have any fresh fruit, tobacco or alcohol, and "have a nice day". The new person asks everything from what you had to eat that morning to who won the World Series five years ago. You better get that answer right or you are surrounded and escorted to a parking place where your car will be totally disrupted. You are sent inside while this is going on to wait your turn to answer more questions. No one smiles. No one makes you feel welcome. You don't read. You don't open your purse. You sit and stare straight ahead until your name is called. Always feels a little like prison, but that is another time.

Anyway, back to my story. Of course there was snow and ice to contend with and that was a cause of concern. I did not put snow tires on my car. A normal five hour trip turned into a nine hour trip with a quick pass at the border and well-meaning thoughts from the seasoned border guard ... "You should have gone yesterday when the weather was good. Have a nice day".

I finally arrived at my youngest daughter's house, where I had a wonderful visit with her and her husband, one cat named Diesel and two beagles named Tater and Massey. Don't ask. Oops! You asked. Well Diesel is for the stuff that powers the farm machinery; Tater is just Tater. She is fat with a tiny head, just a little out of proportion. Massey is for Massey Ferguson tractors. My daughter's husband is a farmer. Yep...can't believe you missed the clues.

I had worked fourteen nights straight before making this trip, After going to the party and driving, I just wanted to collapse. My oldest daughter brought over her fiancee for me to meet. Charming gentleman. I found him beneath all the tattoos that covered his body. Don't get me wrong, they have their place. I even have three myself. One I was able to pass off to my mother as a black and blue bruise for the longest time. She despised tattoos. Anyway, he was charming as I said. Younger than my daughter, but her kids loved him and she was happy for the first time in a long time.

Since it was two weeks till Christmas, I left the presents and fought my way home past three jack-knifed semi trucks, four cars in the ditch, and a two hour hold up while the road was cleared of a disassembled car that hit a divider. When I arrived home, I got out of the car and threw up. I think there was a little stress there.

If you are traveling this holiday, please leave early, have snow tires, and drive for the weather. I want you safe.






Non-Fiction Writing Contest contest entry

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The book continues with Did You Find Yourself?. We will provide a link to it when you review this below.

Author Notes
889 words

cleo85 thank you for permission to use your picture.
Pays one point and 2 member cents. Artwork by cleo85 at FanArtReview.com

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