Congratulations, Ms. Jessup.
I’m Kelly from Publisher House
It’s my pleasure to inform you
that you’ve won an all-expenses
paid vacation to Isle of Franco.
Really? You must be joking?
No ma’am. This is your lucky day.
How are you feeling right now?
Well, since you asked, the golden throne
and I have become the best of friends today.
Must have been that sauerkraut and sausage
I ate last night. Suppose the hot sauce on
my scrambled eggs didn’t help.
I’m sorry to hear about your disposition.
My disposition is fine!
I didn’t wake up on the wrong side
of the bed. I never saw my bed.
Well, I was talking about the vacation,
a trip of a lifetime.
Trip of a lifetime, huh?
Where is this Isle of Franco?
I’m not sure of the exact location,
but I know it’s a tropical paradise.
Seriously, you don't know?
My sister is a travel agent.
I bet she can tell us.
Well, I’m really on a time crunch
I’d like to get you signed up
before someone else grabs it.
What? How can someone else
claim my vacation if I won it?
Your name was drawn for the vacation
but you have to submit a check for $439.00
to cover bar fees and miscellaneous charges.
I thought you said it was all-expenses paid?
It is after you submit your check.
Nothing else will be charged to you.
What if I don’t drink?
Well, your check covers miscellaneous charges.
Miscellaneous charges? That’s vague.
What else would I be paying for?
Well, unless you live in the Miami area,
of course, you would have your transportation,
hotel charges, concierge tips, parking fees, dinner
and taxi fees to get to the docks.
So my check for $439 covers all of those things?
Not exactly. Those charges would be your own personal ones.
Let’s see if I understand this!
Everything is paid except for bar tabs,
miscellaneous items and numerous charges
including a hotel room, concierge tips, transportation,
dinner, and parking fees. Is that correct?
Oh, I forgot to mention the short cruise
from Miami to the Bahamas. You will be
responsible for purchasing that ticket.
If you wish to share your vacation with
someone else, you or your guest would be
responsible for all their expenses.
But just focus on that beautiful sandy beach
with waves lapping at your toes
while you sip on pina coladas.
Pina Coladas that I have to pay for, correct?
Come on, Ms. Jessup, don’t be so negative. Think about -
All the money I have to pay out
for this all-expenses paid trip?
Think about all the memories and
the relaxing time you will have.
Actually, I’m thinking more about my bathroom
and less about this trip.
Oops! Glad we don’t have smell-a-phones
My husband and I checked out the trip.
We had the most fantastic time. Nine months later
we had proof of all the enjoyment we had.
Doesn’t that sound wonderful?
My babies are four-legged.
Oh! Oh, I get it! Dogs! Duh!
Well, I didn’t mean you would have babies,
but you would have an exciting time regardless.
One question - you and your husband went on this trip
and had such a magnificent time,
but you can’t remember where it’s located?
Guess we had too many of those tropical drinks.
So what do say, can we complete
this vacation form and get you scheduled?
I think I should let you talk to my husband,
Police Sergeant Mike Jessup.
Just one second, I’ll get him.
Oh, Ms. Jessup, I am so sorry,
but my boss just said someone beat you to it.
They’ve signed up and you
unfortunately have missed out.
Have a great day! Bye!