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 Category:  Humor Script
  Posted: August 12, 2020      Views: 81

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 ABOUT
ELCHUPAKABRA 

Once upon a time I was harsh but time has worn me down and taught me; empathy is not a weakness. ~ Jack (Elchupakabra)

He is a top ranked author at the #53 position.

He is also an active reviewer and is holding the #29 spot on the top ranked reviewer list.

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Warning: The author has noted that this contains the highest level of language.
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INTRO - A film script I'm working on; rough copy.
"Phone Jockeys" by elchupakabra



BANGLADESH POLICE HEADQUARTERS, DHAKA - INT. CELL - DAY

Two young white men, approximately 25 to 30 years old, are sitting in the jail cell. ALEX looks petrified. JAMES is scared too, but is trying to hold it together.
                                     
JAMES

I told you, I begged you...

ALEX

I know.

JAMES

You swore.

ALEX

I said I was sorry.

JAMES

(snorts loudly) You're sorry!?

ALEX

Stop.

JAMES

You're sorry. Downright apologetic. Allow me to shower you with my forgiveness! Oh, wait a minute, we'll probably be getting golden showers IN PRISON!!!

ALEX

Come on, man, please.

JAMES

Nothing to say now, huh? That's a first. Maybe take this as a learning experience for once in your life, yeah?

JAMES stews, twisting his hands together tightly, his face wound in anger.
 
JAMES

What drives me nuts, what absolutely burns me, is you drag me down with your irresponsible bullshit! I was trying to get away from you, from LA, from all of it, but you insisted and stupid me, I let you talk me into it.

 
PRISONER #1 (O.S.)

(snorts, spits a big loogie into the toilet)

Both of the boys look at each other in disgust.
                                                          
JAMES

If we get out of this somehow, and that's a big fuckin' if... I'm done with you.

ALEX

Don't say that.

JAMES stares at ALEX, enraged. ALEX looks away.
                                                     
JAMES

I mean it. Never again, man. Never. We're done.

CAMERA PULLS OUT FROM CELL, FADE OUT

INTRO SONG: FLUORESCENT ADOLESCENT by ARCTIC MONKEYS (see description)

MONTAGE OF OLD PHOTOS, VIDEO CLIPS - The photos and videos are grainy, dated from the 1990's. It is a collection of home photos and videos of JAMES and ALEX growing up together, from the age of 5, through high school and even college graduations, to young adulthood, approximately 20 years of age. The final photos show them loading up a moving truck, with one final video of them hugging their parents and driving away, the back of the truck fading into the distance. END OF MONTAGE - FADE OUT

The music fades out but is still playing at a low level. CAMERA PANS OUT from a closeup of a 90's style discman on a desk.

INT. SERVCOMM INC. OFFICE BUILDING - LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - DAY

JAMES types absent-mindedly, unaware of his surroundings, lost in his music. He is sitting in a tight cubicle, surrounded by stacks of disorganized papers and knick-knacks, mostly nostalgic junk from his childhood. ALEX appears behind him wearing a fully pressed, three piece suit. He is very dapper. They are both 27 years old, however, they are two sides of a coin. JAMES is disheveled and wears comic book t-shirts under his button down office attire, while ALEX is positively preening, devoted to his appearance.

 
ALEX

Would it kill you to clean this shit up?

JAMES ignores ALEX, continuing to click away furiously at his keyboard.
                                                          
ALEX

Are you coming to the meeting?

JAMES

What meeting?

ALEX

We have a meeting at ten, didn't you get the memo?

JAMES

What memo?

ALEX

It was in the weekly email drop.

JAMES

I never check those.

ALEX sighs, beleaguered by JAMES' indifference.
                                                                      
ALEX

Well, come on then. Let's go have a toke so we'll be ready for the meeting.

JAMES

Fine, but you're rolling.

JAMES removes his headphones and gets up to leave with ALEX.

As they're leaving, they run into WAYNE HOSEIN, their nemesis. WAYNE is a funny little man, short and thin with an assortment of beige, tweed pants that he wore with the same brown loafers and white button up t-shirt and a barrage of heinous looking ties. Even more peculiar, WAYNE's head was bic-shaved bald, save for a small patch of hair on the back of his head fashioned into a rat-tail like ponytail, as if he had decided to grow a monk's braid only the day before.
                                                                              
WAYNE

(enthusiastically) Hey guys! Are you boys headed to the meeting early to get a good spot? Bet I beat you there.

JAMES and ALEX brush past WAYNE without a word. WAYNE smiles and scampers off toward the board room with an awkward, dawdling power walk.

CUT TO - EXT. SERVCOMM INC. OFFICE PARKING LOT - JAMES' CAR INT.

Recognized

Author Notes
The intro song:


I've had this idea rattling around the ol' noodle for many years, but I'd sort of fallen out of the habit of writing. Trying to force myself back into it so bear with me as this is a pure rough copy that I'll be sharing :) Many thanks in advance.

(O.S.) = off screen

*Please note certain formatting changes were made to make it easier to read on FanStory and are not traditional of normal scripts.

This is just the introduction, more to come :)
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

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